Anyways, she is hosting a link up today that I couldn't wait to be a part of. I LOVED Creative Writing in High School and College, in fact LOVED writing all together. But then my old job at Corporate America called, and it was something that fell by the wayside. I am trying to be better about it, trying to really make time to sit and reconnect with that area of my life I love so much, and when I saw this post... I knew I had to get started on something.
Now mind you, my grammar may not be perfect, and as I have not sat down to write something like this in oh... say 8yrs, the story itself is sketchy and choppy, too. But I loved taking the time to write, read, edit and write some more. I am hoping Ashley makes this a regular link up, as I am hooked!
Alright, enough about that....
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She hesitated at the post box, not knowing if she should really send the letter.
After all of this time, would it matter, or would the words on the page go unread, as had his. She tried again to remember exactly where she had placed that envelope, but her memory was failing her. Perhaps it was for good reason. She had moved on with her life, and from the lack of communication, so had he.
Her hand was still shaking as she placed the letter back in her purse and started walking back up the drive. Now was not the time to be kicking old leaves… she was supposed to have moved on. It was her choice to end things, and given that she had technically ended things 3 times, she knew that this time would go the exact same way. It wasn’t healthy for either of them, and it was time to let the past be just that.
Once she was back in the house, she started sifting through the piles of paperwork she had let litter her desktop. Maybe that forgotten envelope was here? At this point in time, she was just hoping for some clue as to where she had put these mementos, souvenirs of a time that could have been hers, had she not watched the sand fall through her fingers. This was a man that had tried again and again to show her how devoted he was to her, and she had brushed him off.
What had she been afraid of all those years ago? Again, her memory was sketchy at best. It had been at least 30yrs, he might not even still be alive. The thought crushed her, but she couldn’t let it show. She was a strong woman, independent and carefree. She wasn’t one to be defined by feelings, actions, etc. How dumb that sounded now, at her age. She certainly wasn’t a feeble old woman, but she wasn’t 24 either. Life was different now. And it was the way it should be.
Still, she wished that as silly as it sounds, they could have at least been friends. Not people who only communicated every 6mos, but honest friends. She had so many “fair weather” friends, she wished desperately for someone, besides William, she could share something with. Of course, he would only accept that with his conditions, and being a girl who is not given ultimatums, time and again she shot him down, and was left alone.
Still, she glanced at that letter on the table, the one she had tried to send over and over again. The one containing the key… it was old and rusty now, might now even fit the lock. But she still had it. Not for long though.
She walked back down the city block, towards that blue bin of steel. Once opened, there was not getting this letter back… its contents could only do more damage, she was sure. However much, she wasn’t certain, but for once in her life she felt the need to be heard. And she definitely heard the clanging of the metal as she closed the swinging door of that post box.
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