Help Me Calm My Crazies...

Now, if J were to write this post, he would tell you I am certifiably insane 98% of the time, and that this is a minor case, but I seriously was freaking out Saturday night at work for a bit, until I re-ran the day in my head.

I have many fears... Irrational as they may be.  Losing J or a family member, Getting sick myself, Losing a tooth, etc.  But right there near the top of the list... House Fires.

When I was 12, we had Christmas with my dad, like we do every year.  I don't remember details, but it was at the very beginning of my parents divorce, and my dad and I were not close.  I remember he was being a jerk, so I called my mom to come and get us.  She rushed over, and when we got home, she told me to open the house door so I could help get my sisters and stuff inside.

I remember opening the door, and all I could see was gray, and all I could hear was the smoke alarm.  I yelled for my mom, and then for my dog and cat... my mom quickly set my sisters in the front yard, and I ran to the neighbors to call 911.  The firefighters found the dog pressed against the sliding glass door, and the cat downstairs.

My mom was doing a massive clean/purge (as it was right after Christmas, and she always makes room for the new stuff) and had a candle burning.  When I called her freaking out, she bolted from the house, and that candle was left burning.  The fire started in the living room, but the smoke damage was extensive all throughout the house (my room was the least damaged as it was at the far end and the door was always closed).

Needless to say, while we dealt with insurance companies and the rebuilding, we lived in some pretty sketchy rentals set up by our insurance co.  The fire was in the very beginning of Jan, and we didn't move back in until almost May.

Now to today... I am so paranoid!  I will not burn a candle unless I am in the room with it at all times.  If for some reason I think we forgot to blow it out, I have been known to leave J at a restaurant and run home to double check.  I am also super paranoid about turning off the stove and oven, and since we have a gas stove, not leaving ANYTHING on the surface.  That was my freakout Saturday.  J was gone for the weekend, and I used both to make myself brunch.  I thought for sure I left something on... and thought about leaving work to go home and dbl check.  However, I ran through my routine in my head and realized there was no way I left something on.   Seriously though, I was making myself sick thinking about it!

And it doesn't help that the laundry room in our apt building shares a wall with our bathroom... a few months ago we came in the front door, which we NEVER do, and noticed the washer was smoking!  The neighbors had shoved it so full, the agitator couldn't turn and the motor was burning up.  It makes me cringe to think what could have happened!!!

When I would house sit also, I would worry I left the stove on in someone else's house ALL the time, even though I am super careful and never did... ugh!!!

Am I alone in this, or do you have things that seriously freak you out and make you worry?